What "WE" are trying to build at Carrie Downie addresses these. I want to address these 2 words. For the rest of this I will refer to difficult/hard as difficult as my students say "hard", but difficult is a good substitute.
"Am I in trouble?" is asked so much in my office, I don't even want to address it. Sometimes it is clear, but many times it is not. In either case, what does "in trouble" mean? Did you do wrong? Did you distract the class? Did you harm someone? So many questions. At the end of the day are you with us for the long run... the answer to that is always, "YES". You are a #cddolpohins, so that being the case are you in trouble? Being in "trouble" is not a finish line but a speed bump. I don't like the word, can you learn from your mistake? YES. Let's get rid of that word, we are learning together, you made a mistake, and there may be serious consequences, but we need to learn from that. The problem with "trouble" is when students start to think it is not a learning process, but an end game, we all make mistakes, some repeatedly. How do we improve? Practice and consistency in implementation. Students need to understand that they are not "trouble makers" but at times make mistakes and wrong decisions. This is our job as educators to teach them what are good choices.
This all might not be groundbreaking, but I think we get rid of the words "difficult" and "trouble" from edulanguage. They should not exist and should be replaced with "not yet?" and "was that the right choice?". By asking students questions vs. telling them, creates thought and reflection. Without that we are dictating what we think and not personalizing their learning. Put the thought on them, let them think through what is going on, don't tell them what we think, that is not important. What is important is what they they think about "not yet?" and "did I make the right choice?"