Each Sunday was and still is sacred. I may not be able to watch every game, but I have listened on the radio, or in the past few years avoided all media, because I recorded the game. Even when Doug Pederson was the quarterback I watched. I prefer to watch alone. I don't really get into talking strategy or match-ups throughout the week. I have only been to one game in person on purpose. I have a special relationship with each of the players, although I also know this is silly. My favorite of all time is Andre Waters, but if you ask me, I will tell you Brian Dawkins. My favorite lineman was Clyde Simmons, but if you ask me I will say Reggie White. My favorite players are never who I state, not because I am embarrassed about my choices, but because on some weird level, I don't want to share "my guys". Which this blogpost is clearly doing!
I have only ever had a few offensive players in my top 20, which would probably include Duce Staley, Charlie Garner, Randall Cunningham, Fred Barnett, Jason Peters, and maybe one day Carson Wentz (sorry, just too new). All the rest are defensive players.
I have never really liked any of the coaches except Buddy and now Pederson. I hated Kotite, I knew Rhodes was a placeholder, Chip was like a one night stand, and I respected Big Red, but never wanted to go have a beer with him. As far as assistants, I will say Jim Johnson and Ron Harbaugh both have special places in my heart.
As far upper management. Lurie... He is steadily growing on me. He has pushed my needle towards positive recently, so he is trending in the right direction. Roseman has shown me a lot lately, definitely trending positive. I am probably one of the few people that liked Joe Banner, but Tom Heckert never really did anything for me. I don't remember much before these regimes, when it comes to upper level management without doing research. Which for this post, I have done none.
"What one win can do..."
One win on Sunday will justify all the time and emotions dedicated to this team over the years. It will solidify the notion that a community winning is a healthy community. It will prove that although I am definitely an Eagles pessimist all the time, I will have a moment of celebration... I have to think about that. Not just for 6 days after a win, but for months, maybe years of feeling celebration.
It will also not allow me to complain constantly. It will not allow me to say, "but" "I am scared" "I just don't know" and many other things as it relates to how I talk about my beloved team. It won't allow me to growl at the TV for a while, or say %$&*^% when they go 3 and out again next season. I will have to admit we finally won a Super Bowl!
I want to win, but as a true Eagles fan I am really scared I won't know how to deal with it. I won't know how to say "we are Super Bowl Champions"! I won't believe it, I definitely won't say "Super Bowl Champions" too much, as it might change the already decided outcome.
I am currently too confident, I know this... It worries me. I need to be worried. I need to be nervous, I need to doubt my team. This is how I have been raised as an Eagles fan. My anxiety is if we win, I won't know how to react. I am afraid of losing my/our identity.
I don't want to lose, I am just panicked and shaken, that with a win, I won't know how to be an Eagles fan anymore....
Guess I will have to figure it out... Like I said, I think we are going to win!